Nkuko twatangiye iyi nyigisho yacu ifite umutwe ugira uti :” Ibintu wakora kugirango ugaragarize uwo mwashakanye ko umukunda by’ukuri “ Mbere tuakaba twarabagejejeho ibice bibiri by’iyi nyigisho ,ubu tukaba tugiye gukomeza tugaruka ku gice cya gatatu cyayo .
Muri iki gice cya gatatu turakomeza tureba ibindi bintu bituma abashakanye banezezanya kugira ngo urukundo rwabo rusangambe. Ni ngombwa ko bagira igihe cyihariye bari hamwe kuko buri wese akeneye ko abona undi amwitayeho amutega amatwi, kaba nabyise icyo umuntu yita “Guha uwo mwashakanye umwanya mwiza wihariye”.
Guha uwo mwashakanye Umwanya mwiza wihariye bishaka kuvuga ko ugomba kugena igihe ukitarura ibintu byose n’ukuvuga utarangarijye mu kureba amafirime,umupira ,imiziki kuri Television,gufata umwanya wawe munini uri murugo wibereye kuri Machine (Raptop),kuri Telephone no mu bindi bishobora kurangaza umuntu.
Ukwiriye gusobanukirwa ko igihe uri kuganira na mugenzi wawe warangajwe n’ibi twavuze haruguru mu ganira usa n’udahari kuko ubwenge n’ibitekerezo byawe biba byamaze gutwarwa n’ibyo uri kubona maze ibi bigatuma utabasha gusabana mu kiganiro n’uwo mwashakanye ari nayo mpamvu usabwa ko igihe ushaka gufata umwanya w’umwihariko wo kuganira nuwo mwashakanye ukwiye kwitarura ibi byose ,ukaba wamusohokana ahantu hatuje cyangwa mu kaganira ibi byose bizimije kugirango mubone uko murebana akajisho kur’urukundo uha mugenzi wawe.
Bishaka kuvuga ko muzafata igihe cyo gutembera mugenda n’amaguru kandi muri babiri gusa cyangwa kujya kurira hanze muri Restaurant bijya kumera nk’iby’abantu bari muri Fiancaille ariko biratandukanye ku bashakanye kuko Abafiance buri umwe ashobora kuba afitiye undi isoni .
Mu gihe mu bashakanye bo baba baganira bafite byinshi bunguranaho ibitekerezo ndetse rimwe na rimwe ubabonye aho akagira ngo intego yabo niyo gufata amafunguro ariko kuribo intego ntaba ariyo ahubwo aba ari ukugirango bahindure uruganiriro.
Burya iyo umugabo yicaranye n’ umugore akamuha iminota 45 cyangwa isaha amwitayeho ari kumwumva bigira umumaro ukomeye kuko muri iyo minota niho mubasha kuvuganira ukuri kose ndetse mu kanaganira kw’iterambere ry’urugo rwanyu bityo abashakanye bakwiye kwiha intego yo kujya bafata umwanya bakaganira bituma urugo rwabo rukomera kandi rukazira amakimbirane kuko byose biba byacocewe mu ruganiriro.
Ikindi umuti umwe ntabwo ushobora kuvura uburwayi bwose niyo mpamvu habaho imiti inyuranye cyangwa se ikaba imiti ivanze bakuye mu miti itandukanye. Akaba ari yo mpamvu njya gutangira icyigisho cya mbere nabaje kukubaza ibibazo bibiri nti”1. Mbese waba uzi ibikorwa by’urukundo uwo mwashakanye yagukorera bigatuma urushaho kumukunda ?
2. Mbese waba uzi ibikorwa by’urukundo wakorera uwo mwashakanye bigatuma anezerwa, akumva ko umukunda?
Ikiryoshya urukundo n’uguha uwo mwashakanye igihe cyihariye ukamwumva umuhanze amaso kandi umutima wawe ndetse n’ibitekerezo biri kuri we kandi bakaba bari ahantu hatari ibirangaza.
Nk’urugero mu gihe umupapa yicaye hasi muri salon ( kuri floor) basunika agapira n’ umwana w’ imyaka 2 ibitekerezo bye ntabwo biba biri ku umupira ahubwo biba biri kuri uwo mwana ariko mu gihe uwo mu papa yaba ari gusunika ako gapira abifatanya no kuvugira kuri Telephone icyo gihe ibitekerezo bye ntabwo biba biri kuri uwo mwana.
Abagabo bamwe n’abagore babo bibwira ko bakoresha Igihe cyabo hamwe kuko baba mu inzu imwe, mu mwanya umwe ,mu masaha amwe ariko ntabwo baba bari kumwe kuko birasohobka ko waba ubana n’umuntu mu nzu ariko ukamwima umwanya kandi wowe utabizi kuko buri gihe iyo ashatse ko mu ganira uba ufite ibindi wibereyemo .
Iyo umugabo ari kwandikira umugore ubutumwa bugufi (message) cyangwa kuvugana kuri Telephone ntabwo aba ari kumuha igihe cy’ ubuzima kuko aba atari gukoresha ubwenge kandi n ’ibitekerezo bye ntibiba biri kuri we.
Gutanga umwanya wihariye kuwo mwashakanye ntabwo bivuga kuba muri hamwe mu koresha igihe cyanyu murebana mu maso gusa ahubwo ni ugukorera ikintu hamwe kandi ku buryo buri wese ibitekerezo bye biri kuwundi ntakindi kiri ku murangaza.
Mu gihe umugabo n’ umugore bari gukinana Tennis, byerekana guhana Igihe kuri buri wese ntabwo biba ari ugushyira ibitekerezo kuri uwo mukino ahubwo biba biri ku gikorwa cyo gusangira igihe cyawe na mugenzi wawe.
Ibyo kandi bigakurikirwa n’ibiganiro (communication) yerekana ko buri wese ari kwita kuri mugenzi we, kuko bose baba bari kunezererwa ko buri wese ari kumwe n’undi, kandi bose basa nkaho bari gukora ibintu bimwe.
Iyo uwo mwashakanye anezezwa no ku muha umwanya wihariye bizagusaba nabwo kumenya uburyo muganira kuko akenshi bisaba ku mutega amatwi kandi ukamwereka ko uri kumva amarangamutima ye.
Ndagirango muri iyi nyigisho nzaguhe ibintu bigera ku icumi bizagufasha muri icyo gihe.
1: Bizagusaba kumureba mu gihe ari kukuvugisha, ibitekerezo byawe ugomba kubiganisha kuri we.
2. Ntugashake kumva ibyo uwo mwashakanye ari kukubwira uri kwikorera ibindi: Iyo uri gukora ibindi ntushobora kuvana ibitekerezo byawe kuribyo ako kanya bizagusaba ku mu bwiza ukuri, ukamubwira uti: nibyo ndabona ko ushaka kuvugana najye ndabyishimiye ariko ndashaka kukumva neza.
Kubera ibyo ntabwo nabikora kano kanya ariko ubaye ushobora kumpa iminota15 nkabirangiza. Ndaza kwicara hasi nkumve. Bamwe barabyubahiriza nta kibazo.
3.Genzura uko yitwara ari ku kubwira: hari igihe aba ari gukubita mu biganza bye, ari kurira, ugomba gukurikirana movement ari kuguha biza gufasha kumenya uko amerewe (feeling).
Izindi nama nakugira igihe uzaba umaze kumenya ko uwo mwashakanye akunda guhabwa umwanya wihariye bizagusaba nabwo ibi bikurikirana:
Kujyana nawe gutembera mugenda n’ amaguru hafi yaho mutuye.
.-Niba mutuye mu mujyi mushobora kujya gutembera muri city Park mushobora nabwo kujya ahantu hari rose garden mu kajya muvugana kumabara yayo ,ayo akunda ni impamvu yabyo.
4. Ushobora kubwira uwo mwashakanye ku kwandikira ibintu bigera kuri bingahe bikunda ku munezaza. Maze wihe intego yo kujya byibura ukora kimwe buri kwezi ku mezi atanu akurikirana.
. Ugomba gutekereza ibintu mugenzi wawe bimunezeza kurushaho niyo kuri wowe byaba bitakunezeza cyane. Umubwire ko ushaka ko buri rimwe mu kwezi ushaka kuzajya ujyana nawe.
Imana Ihe urugo rwanyu umugisha.
Hazaza ikindi gice.
Iri jambo muritegurirwa kandi mukarigezwaho na Rev./Ev. Eustache Nibintije, Umunyeshuri wa Patriots Bible University yo muri Leta Zunze Ubumwe za Amerika.
Tel: +14128718098
Email: [email protected]
